I often become obsessed with certain random things that I experience or see in my daily life. About a year ago, I became enthralled by the presence and absence of colors. I loved seeing bright, crazy colors meshed together, whether it was in an art piece or something as simple as a bracelet that I bought. Then, the color white became something of interest, which is a huge reason why I all of a sudden started adding such pale girls to my dolly family. Pigeon, my albino Blythe, was a huge deal for me. (She still is.) There's something so beautiful about her that I can't quite find in any other doll. Swiss, my ball-jointed doll, also only wears white (except on a few rare occasions), and she will remain another pale darling in my family. I've been even thinking about more additions to my family, just so I can play around with the idea of colors. I don't even know if I can call this obsession of mine a hobby.
Then, there are dollies, vinyl toys, books, films, creating graphics. I even recently mentioned my attraction to water. I think that could have been the first inanimate "object" that really took hold of me in a trance kind of way. Sometimes I don't know where I get all the time to enjoy everything at once and keep up with the responsible part of my life. Yeesh.
Lately, I've become enamored with collarbones and their delicate placement on the human body. Like the color fetish, I don't quite know what to do with my collarbone interest other than take photos of them. On that note... I realized how difficult it is to come across models for my photography. Unlike big cities on the east and west coasts of the states, Wisconsin isn't very diverse, even in the Milwaukee area. People are more close-minded in the central states, and that factor harbors any chance of me expanding my photography. I know that if I look around more, I'll be able to find new subjects for photos, but I still want a chance to get out there and photograph something a little more stimulating.
The easiest subject to focus on is, of course, myself. I'm always here, and I know exactly how I want a photograph to turn out. My dollies are a close second. I think now is the time to expand myself and my creative abilities to another level. I'm thinking about new mediums I can use in order to achieve some sense of... enlightenment, if that makes sense. In the past, I've painted, drawn, written (stories, poems, etc.), and have made random pieces of art, so I think I'll try to combine everything that I love doing somehow. A collaboration sounds like fun, but I don't know how motivated I'm going to be with classes around. I know I'll think of something-- it's just a matter of time before the big creative boom hits me in the face, haha.
Wow,
You are beautiful sweetie!
Posted by: Jayce & Caiden's Mommy | January 27, 2007 at 10:24 PM
I can understand the obession with body parts. I had a friend on LiveJournal who got her hips pierced, and I just loved the way it looks. The shape of hips have been something I've always been attracted to in both guys and girls. I love wrapping my arms around Thomas's hips (even if he falls down as a result).
I'm glad that you are so comfortable with photographing yourself. I know that I'm not at that point yet and unfortunately for me it means that I don't get to use my new camera as often as I would like. Hopefully as I achieve my goals in weight & other body image issues I will be more open to turning the lens on myself.
Posted by: Girl Gone Mad | January 27, 2007 at 10:34 PM
[this is good] oh how i love black + white photos. you look so natural and innocent in them, yet there seems to be a sense of mystery in your eyes. fantastic shots, my lovely!
i can relate to being obsessed with color. i go from liking vibrant color combinations in almost any form to being completely sucked into the absence of color. i love things in black + white as much as i like things in beautiful array of colors.
Posted by: Celena | January 27, 2007 at 10:48 PM
Your pictures always look awesome.
Posted by: Nick | January 27, 2007 at 11:21 PM
[this is good] obsessed is a way of life, images drive thoughts, colours breed emotion, and obsessive compulsive is curiosity driving the mind and making a much more interesting person.
Posted by: Jamie | January 28, 2007 at 12:40 AM
im obsessed with collarbones too!!!
I think all medical students are.. :p
i remember sitting with my friends both males and females and we were reading a magazine, we saw this picture and all of us said,
"she's got a nice clavicle" HAHAHAHAHA :p
Posted by: ╭★シェリー☆╮ | January 28, 2007 at 12:44 AM
[this is good] You are the perfect model for you pictures Lauren!!! You are very
pretty!!! ^-^ I also like the way you write! This blog entry was
written so nicely, I can tell you have taken many English and
literature classes!!! ;-). You are very intellegent. Your doll
like Pigeon happens to be one of my favorites of yours besides Hue of
course!!!
Posted by: Tracy | January 28, 2007 at 12:45 AM
Excellent shots of you, very beautiful and sexy.I like collarbones, remember my oil painting? ;)
Posted by: gollykim | January 28, 2007 at 01:07 AM
wow, those pictures are very powerful. i love self-portraits. and the composition is great!
Posted by: bernifest | January 28, 2007 at 01:41 AM
[this is good] Stunning photos of you, darling. ^_^
I've also got an obsession with collarbones - one of my favorite parts of the body, actually and I really like hipbones too.
Posted by: Lena Katrin | January 28, 2007 at 04:35 AM
[this is good] Your photos are amazing and you are so pretty!
Posted by: Virtuous Woman | January 28, 2007 at 09:29 AM
[this is good]
You have sexy eyes.. i love the way you look. Nice photos too.. ^_^
Posted by: NOOS | January 28, 2007 at 09:31 AM
Great photos Lauren; The images and poses remind me of when I lived in Asia and I would travel to areas where there were very few American visitors and I would catch people out of the corner of my eye looking at the strange white guy, without trying to be obvious.
Posted by: Wislander | January 28, 2007 at 10:58 AM
I like collarbones too. When they just stick out a little...not dramatically (ie dangerously thin). Like yours. :D Good pictures.
Posted by: Brandy | January 28, 2007 at 01:12 PM
Thankies, everyone. <3
Kimberly- *blush*
Nick- Thank you! I work really hard on all of the ones I choose to post.
Kim- Oh... I think I do... And thank you. ^__^
Bernadette- I like to sometimes make photos appear more dramatic than some. I take so many photos of everything kawaii around me that I forget to show the more serious side of my life.
Esq.- <3
Brandy- I agree. I don't like collarbones that stick out too much. Sometimes I don't like my own, because they're on the thinner side, but I've learned to structure my body a certain way for photos so they don't look too creepy, heh.
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:04 PM
There's really something about the entire human body that is beautiful. I'll admit-- I'm attracted to very few people (whether they be men or women), but certain features really stand out. You're right. Hips can be very appealing to the eye.
It's taken me a while to get to the point of being so comfortable in front of my camera. I've been posing for years, but I know that I probably wouldn't have taken photos like this when I first started. I would have thought they were inappropriate. Now that my more liberal and adult mind has formed, I can take in the beauty of the curves of the human body. <3
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:07 PM
I'm glad you noticed the natural sense. I didn't mention in my entry the very little makeup I used for this shoot. I had on mascara from earlier in the day, and then I added a little lip gloss so my mouth would have a different tone, but other than that, I wanted to be natural. I like black and white photos with that natural appeal.
I think we're both similar with our love for colors. That's reflected with the vinyl toys and dollies we yearn for. ^__~ Tee hee.
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:09 PM
I never thought about it that way. I suppose it's only natural for humans to become so connected to certain features of life. Without them, we would lack the innate creativity that drives us every day.
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:11 PM
That's so funny. I didn't even think about medical students and collarbones like that. I thought of the curves to be more aesthetically pleasing to writers, but after I read your comment, what you said really made sense. I've had a bias against the medical field since I was young, because my dad often tried to force me to become a doctor. I try to be more fair to people now though, especially since a friend of mine is becoming a doctor, and I completely respect all the hard work she puts into her studies. I think all fields need to have that aesthetic appeal-- I can see why collarbones are the muse for med students!
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:13 PM
Haha, thankies. <3 Sometimes my love for English (writing and art) really comes out in my entries, and sometimes it remains hidden. I think I was in "the zone" last night when I was writing this. I took the photos at 9:30 p.m., and I rarely take photos at night, because I crave natural lighting. I think entries like this are meant to be... for my own sake. ^^
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 02:15 PM
[this is good] Love the new banner and photos! :o)
I love your admiration for all things beautiful.
Posted by: Inga | January 28, 2007 at 04:34 PM
Yeah, it was a fun graphic to make because the concept was natural and simple. ^_^
And thank you, sweets. I've always had a craving for aesthetics...
Posted by: Lauren | January 28, 2007 at 11:00 PM
[esto es genial]
I even recently mentioned my attraction to water.
To this day I think that water has enchanting but dangerous qualities. I try not to go to the beach alone because it looks so inviting. Even though from experiance I know the water on the pacific side is really cold and dark, part of me wants to go in it. It looks oddly warm and a lighter blue when the oceans waves mix with sand and the light hits in just the right way. Part of me has the craziest idea that I could go in and discovery an underwater kingdom.
Posted by: Kittybomber | January 29, 2007 at 01:20 AM
[this is good] Your pictures are amazing as usual, your composition and placement is exquisite, and your stunning beauty is well served in black and white. I like the curves and lines of the female form, and the occasional male, but mostly female.
Lauren your pictures are always so beautiful and keep me coming back to see more, and I love your daring in playing with colour and light.
PS. I added you to my top Five list in my post today ;)
Posted by: little wonders | January 29, 2007 at 12:55 PM
*blush* You always leave the nicest comments, Jeff. Sometimes I don't even know how to respond, but I can say thank you-- so thank you. I'd like to experiment more with how the body moves and the way it's formed. I'll see what I can come up with...
And thank you for the mention in the Top Five. That's so awesome! *dances* =D
Posted by: Lauren | January 29, 2007 at 02:01 PM
There is something so magical about water that I will never be able to place. It's such a mystery, and I think it's that mysterious element that I'm so drawn to. I can tell that it holds its powers over other people, like you, as well. It's good to know that I'm not the only one who finds it so overwhelming at times.
And like you, I'm drawn to it. I think it's that dangerous feeling of wading in a deep body of water that's so appealing to me. I can't explain it. Your words reflected almost exactly how I feel. <3
Posted by: Lauren | January 29, 2007 at 02:03 PM
[this is good] Water is the spring of life, literally so many people are attracted to it, it is also powerful, mysterious and dangerous. So I can understand your fascination with water.
Well here I'm going to skirt leaving a dangerous comment, I love your pics and I would love to see your future experiments with water, and how a body moves and it's form. ;)
Posted by: little wonders | January 29, 2007 at 02:28 PM
You're too right. The fact that water connects every aspect of life is probably the closest answer I'll get to why I'm so drawn to it.
Haha, dangerous comment, eh? Hmm, once the weather gets a little more bearable, I'll be able to experiment with water more...
Posted by: Lauren | January 29, 2007 at 02:56 PM
The dangerous bit was what came after the water ;)
Thinks I might need to hide if Shawn ever reads it.
Posted by: little wonders | January 29, 2007 at 03:22 PM
I think that sometimes black and white photos are even more expressive than coloured ones.
You always take beautiful self portraits. :)
Posted by: Wissam | January 29, 2007 at 04:55 PM
I can relate to the obsession with certain colors, prints, textures...sometimes something just grabs hold of you and makes your insides jump with excitement.
I love that California offers so much diversity- both in terms of the color of people's skin, their culture and their dress. I have sort of an obsession with Downtown Sacramento and could sit for hours just watching people and absorbing the energy that seems to flow like a brand new battery from that place. I sit with my coffee and my book and cigarettes and watch as gay and straight, black and white, short and tall and tattooed; they walk by, clothed in spikes, and mohawks, green hair, caftans, turbans, and sari's, peirced or bearded, bindi's, dreadlocks, crosses and pentagons, all co-existing so happily. Old men, play chess with kids on skateboards, while a girl with pigtails and chuck taylor's writes in her notebook. It's one of the most gorgeous things I've ever seen.
Posted by: Kiss Me Cate | January 29, 2007 at 05:28 PM
Wissam- I agree. I think that one of the most important decisions a photographer can make is how the colors appear in a single photograph. And thank you. I was happy with how this mini-series turned out. ^_^
Cate- You don't know how much I envy you right now. I've made it my mission to move to either the west or east coast. Like you said, there's so much diversity in California. When I was there in August, I could just feel the difference in people. There was more acceptance as well, which is something I crave. My sisters and I are very passionate about the way we look and appear to the world, yet everyone else seems to be stuck in the same mold here in Wisconsin. The picture you painted for me with all the different people in just one location... takes my breath away. How incredibly gorgeous...
Posted by: Lauren | January 29, 2007 at 05:38 PM
Well not to say that all of California is that way, or even all of Sacramento...SF much more so, but it's also very expensive and alot of traffic, you get into the suburb area's around here and things can get pretty bland; that's why I loved living in the middle of the city so much. Everyone looks different, is themself. There is no one way you need to dress, or look like to fit in, you fit in my being yourself. It's incredibly liberating and inspiring.
Posted by: Kiss Me Cate | January 29, 2007 at 05:52 PM
[this is good] Lauren! I LOVE these photos of you. So beautifully done! I also have a special affection for women's collarbones. They seem so strong yet fragile at the same time. I am a "big girl" but I got my mother's pronounced shoulders and collarbones. I love mine!
Posted by: Sista Blu | January 29, 2007 at 07:39 PM
Cate- Oh, I know how scattered the city and suburban communities are in California. I've been there several times in my life, and I swear, every time that I go there, I see a different side of the state. In a way, that fact reflects California's great diversity. WhereverI go in Wisconsin, I see the same people, the same setting, etc.
Sista Blu- =D *dances* Thankies, sweets. I completely agree. Collarbones have that mix of strength and delicacy in their appearance. I bet you have beautiful ones yourself! I think collarbones reflect a lot of who a person is and how he/she carries himself/herself.
Posted by: Lauren | January 29, 2007 at 07:53 PM
hi lauren,
first thing foremost, thanks for droppin by my blog and left me a comment there. lol. in fact i was real stunned to have my post updated just to find your comment there few minutes later up on the blog. (and i dont even know you any other way) haha. to me blogging has always been a very personal thingy. Maybe you found me through the new entries posted on vox or somethin i dunno.
thru your blog, i read some of the entries, found out you have a thing for dolls,eh? also of course to writing and photoshooting, and to fashion and hairstyling. Wow, or even designing web banners. What do u do exactly? hmm..
anyway, with 35 comments on ur blog haha..u must have had alot of readers. Nice blog with great style in everything. And oh, are you mixed? cuz i'm asian too but ur in the states, ur so lucky:).
Posted by: ally | January 30, 2007 at 12:21 AM
No problem. I usually like to browse through the Explore page here at Vox. That page shows the most recently updated blogs, and yours happened to be near the top at the time.
Yup, I have a huge fetish for dolls, writing, photography, design and fashion (in a weird sense). Right now, I'm a student (an English major in college). I do everything you see here in my spare time, mainly because I just love it all. I love expressing myself in every creative way imaginable. I hope that helps clarify. ^_^
I love networking on Vox. I come across so many interesting people on here and throughout the world because of this website. I've known a few for a while now because of other websites, but I came across most of the Voxers through Vox itself. I tend to use Vox as my social outlet. ^^
And yes, I'm mixed. I talked about my nationality, as well as a few other topics you brought up, in my FAQ post, which is located here. Thankies for stopping by, hon. <3 It was nice meeting you!
Posted by: Lauren | January 30, 2007 at 12:32 AM
thats very nice, u even have a FAQ on vox lol. Answer all my questions thoroughly. I am so glad i've finally found a journalist. I've always wanted to go into that stream but somehow didnt..and ended up in taking Information Technology (some IT stuff fond ONLY by guys, which i hated *cries*) but anyway, guess wat? those bracelet that shawn made of u? it looks very unique, special and beautiful:). but doesnt it get dirty easily? since its ropey and light in color. i used to be fond of those too. i call it friendship bracelet and i know how to make, a couple of them, like the one that's slanting down in beads..its not too hard to make:).
Are you 21? or 22? i think ur about the same age as me. and guess wat ? i got two sisters too LOL. Just that im the middle one instead of being the eldest.
We should definitely write to get in touch. I'll try to email you.
Posted by: ally | January 30, 2007 at 12:48 AM
i've dropped you an email at gmail:)
Posted by: ally | January 30, 2007 at 03:21 AM
Those pictures are very sexy, Lauren, if you don't mind me saying. ^__^ My sister and I have always had a thing for collarbones as well, because I think aside from the obvious parts, the collarbone really represents and shows off the female form. I've always told people that my long hair, for some reason, makes me feel more feminine -- but I also always find myself wearing shirts or jackets that show off the collarbone, because I think it's a way to be sexy without being slutty, if you know what I mean. I absolutely love the photos, hon. The black & white really help make the photos look somewhat dark and dangerous, sort of like your expression. ^__^
Too bad I don't live near you, I'd definitely volunteer to be a model. I don't consider myself a bold or outgoing person, but I think in your case, I'd want to be, just so you could get the best photos possible. You take such lovely photos, and you show them in so many different lights that it makes it fun and interesting. I think your creative talents are one of the reasons you're such a popular person here on Vox, aside from the fact that you're just a genuinely kind and sweet person. ^^
Posted by: Jen | January 30, 2007 at 12:20 PM
[this is good]
Posted by: Mr.Nice | January 30, 2007 at 02:18 PM
I made sure to reply to your email when I woke up this morning. It's a nice, long response to everything you said. You're such a fun person to listen to, sweets. Anyway, I hope to hear from you soon. ^_^
Posted by: Lauren | January 30, 2007 at 04:04 PM
Oh, why thankies, Jen! That's so nice of you to say that. I don't mind at all either. Beth and I have always had a fascination with the human body, especially the female body (much like you and your sister do), so we're used to calling other girls and guys sexy. A lot of people question whether it's right or wrong to do that, but really, it's such a natural thought to think and say, so why not? ^_^
I'm trying to get a wide range of expressions. Beth is the true master at modeling herself for photography, and I'm trying to catch on. So far, it's been getting easier and easier every time I take photos. There are good and bad days, of course.
That would be so much fun if you lived near me. I wish you did! I could use a good, smart and sincere friend like you. Another two friends of mine want me to take photos of them, so I'm excited about those shoots. I'll try to post results once they happen. I'd like to wait 'til the weather improves.
Again, thank you for your sweet words. *huggies*
Posted by: Lauren | January 30, 2007 at 04:07 PM
I love those photos. You should be a model.
Posted by: Pixie Wildflower | February 04, 2007 at 06:58 AM
[this is good] collar bones are incredibly sexy.
i really love black and white photography, i have since high school when i took picutres for yearbook. i think it's because you get to paint the colour into the picture in your mind.
Posted by: vampiress | February 04, 2007 at 05:50 PM
[this is good] Lauren: I know... you have received so many compliments here...and you deserve them all! You are a fabulous photographer, there hasn't been a single photo you've posted that I haven't loved. Your passion for your collection, your art and your 'fascinations' is heartwarming and inspirational, I find myself drawn into your posts every time. And, if I may be so blunt, you are beautiful. I absolutely adore your photos. :) You're one of the most treasured people in my neighborhood....thanks for being here. You're a real gem. ^_^
Posted by: Jay | February 06, 2007 at 12:30 AM
Jay, you really don't know how much your comment means to me. I know that every person likes to relish in any compliments, and I'm not exception. I'm so touched that my photography stands out in some way, and to know that you and other Voxers appreciate my entries like you said just makes me feel... accomplished. I really feel like I've done something meaningful with my life and time. Also, thank you for your sweet words about how you see me. I try to get the raw image of me across in my self-portraits, because I really want you and all of my friends to see who I am and what I stand for. I get tired of seeing girls plastered with makeup and accessories that take away from the natural beauty they have. I'd like to promote that natural beauty. I hope that others can walk away with taking that little piece of me, and what I want to represent, to heart.
You're so sweet. Thanks, Jay. ^__^
Posted by: Lauren | February 06, 2007 at 11:27 PM
I think my collar bones are sexy!!!
I have NEVER EVER seen them until I recently lost 120 pounds in a year and a half (mostly due 2 no food $$$), all I can say is--I like it alot better and NEVER EVER EVER want 2 bloat again!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Formerlyobeast | December 22, 2007 at 02:25 PM
Ha! Thanks to you for bringing this post back up into my home page. It's a blast form the past. What a great Christmas present. ^_^
Posted by: Jay | December 22, 2007 at 03:32 PM
I can see my clavicles for the VERY first time in my WHOOOLE entire life!!
I have always been obese and recently lost 120 pounds in a year and a half and personally feel better thinner.
I rub my collarbones sometimes, I think they're hot and notice other women's, as well..
Posted by: Formerlyobeast | December 22, 2007 at 11:14 PM
EEWWEE! EEEWWEEE!!
I'm sorry!!! multiple post! multiple post!!!
EEEWWEEE..SORRY!!
Posted by: Formerlyobeast | December 22, 2007 at 11:16 PM
Huh? what now?
Posted by: Formerlyobeast | December 22, 2007 at 11:18 PM
[this is good] the collar bone and the curve into the neck is just ridiculously sexy. I'm happy to see i'm not alone in that thought.
wow, you look amazingly hot in those pictures. i've always thought the sexiest pictures don't show naughty bits, and you have proven that today.
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