I went to the doctor today because of some health problems I've been having for the past week or so. I've had some severe pains in my stomach, and I had no idea what was causing them. Mom and Dad tried to do a mini exam to see if they could figure out what's going on, but even they were stumped. Mom said that if they continued to cause me problems, I would have to see the doctor today.
It's been so hard concentrating on everything I want to get done lately. As if the pain wasn't enough, I feel like my responsibilities as a human being are giving me more and more pressures.
These feelings were the first signs. I really should have known better.
I didn't go to my usual doctor, because scheduling at the last minute usually doesn't work out so well. I went to another physician that I sometimes see, a friend of the family who works with my dad. She was extremely nice and, unlike my usual doctor, she listened to what was going through my head-- probably because she's known me for so long. I didn't tell Mom this, or even Beth yet, but I almost started crying when I was talking to her. I've been hurting so much lately, and then with everything that flowed out of my head and out into the real world-- I began to realize what was wrong. She did, too.
Alice, my doctor, said that my stomach pains are mostly due to the amount of stress I'm undergoing at the moment. I've talked about everything racing through my mind lately (work, classes coming up next week, and moving to my the new apartment this weekend), but I didn't think that my body would react in such a harsh way. I've learned my lesson.
I took off work most of today; I only did what absolutely needed to be done. Right now, I'm trying to sit and relax without thinking about anything stressful. Even though Beth and I will have to move a bunch of stuff this weekend, I'm hoping that the extra day off on Monday (because of Labor Day) will give me that extra zing I need to pick myself up. It's time to rest; it's time to breathe for a while.
It's hard to believe that Shawn and I were running around and taking photos last weekend. I can't imagine myself doing that today. I feel so drained. Alice also gave me some medication that should hopefully help lessen the pain a little. The medicine has a side effect though: it's going to make me extra sleepy. That isn't a horrible thing right now, but I'm really hoping that it won't affect my schoolwork next week.
Another piece of "medicine" (advice) that Alice gave me was to not worry about school so much at this point. She said that since I've found a job that I want to stick with, a real passion for my future, that I can take some of that burden to get straight A's on my report cards off my shoulders. I know she's right, but it's difficult making a change that drastic. My entire academic lifestyle revolves around trying to do the absolute best. I've made it my personal goal to get on the Dean's List and to stay on the list for as long as possible. I want to graduate college English major with honors, and at this rate, it looks like I'll be able to do so.
Basically, I need to start prioritizing my life. I'm doing more than I've ever done before, and part of this is my own, personal evolution, so I figure that learning to juggle priorities is normal. It's just a rough time for me right now, but once I get a better hang of everything, I think I'll be oh kay.
So, here's to an end and a beginning. *raises glass* Goodbye Summer, hello Life.